... For a star of half a life
For the moon - freedom
I kiss the sky
And it pours water ...
I'm not vindictive. I just have a very good memory.
Sometimes it seems that if I had accidentally sclerosis and forget my soul everything that was in a short, but stormy life, it will become easier for me to breathe. Simply because several huge boulders, lying with a dead weight on this very soul, will fall. Just because there will be nothing to remember on dark nights in complete solitude. Just so that nothing flinches in my chest somewhere to the left of the words spoken once and stuck in my long-suffering memory, like flies in jam. Just for the sake of listening to your favorite songs and not remembering those moments when they played and ... it was incredibly good. Just ... Ugh you, just because it will be easier this way !!!
Everybody says: start life from scratch; start life anew; forget everything and live only in the present and future. Tell me, did anyone succeed? Show me that individual who was able to erase the past from memory. Who could, without the intervention of crazy scientists, who cleaned the brain and soul with a soft cloth, forever forget feelings ... Touch. Kisses. Vote. Intonation. Heat. Smell. Taste. Sight. Smile. The softness of the hair and the tenderness of the skin, preserved at the tips of the fingers with viscous drops of memories ... Will you show it? Then I will say publicly that I am a weakling, an idiot and just a fool who lives and remembers - HOW IT WAS.
But, do you know what is most surprising? What is the most surprising and most disgusting thing? Desire to remember. The desire to remember. The desire to never forget. The desire to live for these memories. Desire in the morning, without opening your eyes, to remember every depression, every mole, every touch, every look of his eyes, every movement of his hands and check yourself - do I remember everything? .. And say with confidence - everything. Damn it, everything !!!
And why? Why do I need this? For what such lofty purpose do I keep all these moments of life under the barn lock in the titanium box of my heart? For what? .. Do you think I can't answer? And that's not true. As an exemplary student, I carefully studied the notes, studied in detail all the information collected bit by bit, memorized the entire long history of storing my memories and now I can answer the questions asked with absolute confidence and without hesitation. I will pass this exam without difficulty, do not hesitate.
Why? What for? For what purpose? But because, in spite of everything, I like to remember. I don't just want to remember, I LOVE to remember him. I love him, I love the memory of him, I love him and never stopped loving. This love does not cause any trouble. She does not make you suffer, does not ask yourself to be cared for and cherished, does not require answering ridiculous questions. She does not force you to be jealous. She absolutely does not need my free time, my thoughts, my loyalty.
She just lives somewhere in the most beautiful and well-groomed corner of my strange soul. She feeds on water and bread - no more. There is no need for this lady to get fat, because if she ever needs it, and you have to fish her out of an old house, from such a warm place, it is necessary that she be as beautiful as at the very beginning of her life, as at birth. She makes you smile in the morning and train your memory. She is pretty and very kind to me - I have never met such gentle and quivering female individuals. True, she asks for herself the same tenderness and affection as she gives herself. But there is nothing complicated here - for how much joy she has already delivered to me and will still deliver, you can pay with her with such precious coins.
And for her sake, for the sake of a delicate ephemeral substance that lives next door to my heart, for the sake of this very aunt named Love, I keep my memories. For her sake, I will never allow my body to be subjected to sclerosis or partial memory loss. Despite the fact that it would probably be easier this way. No matter what.
Yes, it is a viscous, sticky jelly. Yes, these are tons of unspilled tears. Yes, these are millions of unspoken words. Yes, these are thousands of thousands of unshaken glances. Yes, these are billions of unfulfilled hopes to touch. But this is my jelly, my words and tears. This is my life. This is my inspiration. This is my Love.
I do not demand anything in return, and I will never demand. What for? I feel good and so - I am free from obligations.
Sometimes in a strange black and white dream I see my love fluttering in the sky like a weightless white cloud, frolicking in freedom, rejoicing in freedom. And I, devastated and gray, sit on the damp earth, looking at one point - the point of contact with reality, with the uselessness of even such a black-and-white world in the absence of the beauty Love fostered by me ... It becomes scary, I wake up. No, to lose her, forget, move to another place where she gets dusty and freezes, I can never offend her with indifference. I need her much more than she needs me.
Therefore, I will continue to wake up in the morning with thoughts about him - about my beloved. I will remember the smell and taste. I will feed her with bread from my hands and give her pure spring water. After all, she is my Love and nobody else's. I took her under my care, took her in, raised her. And we are responsible for those we have tamed.
... I sit on the window under the stars
I'm waiting for good luck
I count the change
That is why heaven was created
That's why I'm crying now ...
The funniest
Early morning in the village, an ordinary family - mother, son and father without legs,
Early morning in the village, an ordinary family - mother, son and father without legs, which he lost in the war. The son is going to hunt, takes a gun, a cartridge, then Dad crawls up to him and says:
- Son, take me hunting, you really want to!
- Dad, how can I take you, you have no legs, what is the use of you?
- And you sonny put me in a backpack behind my back, and if we suddenly see a bear, you will shoot at him - you will not hit him, turn around with your back, and I will kill him with one shot, you know yourself - I shoot a squirrel in the eye from 100 meters! So we will bring home the prey, there will be something to eat in winter.
The son thought and thought and said - Okay, fuck, let's go.
They walk through the woods, their father sits in a backpack and here a bear meets them. The son shoots, does not hit, shoots again - another miss, turns his back, dad shoots - also waves, again - another miss. The bear is already rushing at them, well, and the son will give a fight, and in the meantime Dad shouts - they say, they will catch up faster! They have been running for an hour, there is no strength, the son understands that they will not run so far with Batya - both will disappear, he decided to throw off his backpack and runs on.
He runs home, all out of breath, and says to his mother:
- Mother, we no longer have a father ... - with tears in his eyes.
The mother calmly puts down the frying pan, turns to him and says:
- How can I, with his hunt, fuck @, then Dad came running 10 minutes ago in his arms, said that we no longer have a son!
Called a man at work for a corporate party, allowed him to come
They called a man at work to a corporate party, allowed him to come with his wives, the corporate party was themed - a masquerade, you had to come in suits, with masks. No sooner said than done, they got together just before they left, and my wife had a headache, she says, "Go without me, and I'll lie at home for now" - and she herself came up with a cunning plan - to follow the man, how he will behave at the masquerade, pester Zinka from accounting or even get drunk. Before leaving, she changed her costume, comes and sees her hubby - sometimes dancing with one, then circling the other, guard! She decided to check how much further he would go, invited him to dance, dance and whisper in his ear: - Maybe we can retire ...
They retired, did their business, my wife quickly went home. The husband arrived a little later, she decided to ask him:
F - Well? How do you like a corporate party ?!
M - Yes, the boredom is gray, we decided with the peasants to go to play poker, and before that Petrovich, our boss asked him to change suits, since he got his own, so he was lucky, can you imagine, some kind of woman in f @ ny gave!
The son comes up to his father and asks: - Dad, what is
The son approaches his father and asks:
- Dad, what is virtual reality?
Dad thinks a little and says to his son:
- Son, to give you an answer to this question, go to your mother, grandmother and grandfather, and ask them if they could sleep with an African for 1 million dollars. He comes up to his mother and asks:
- Mom, could you sleep with an African for $ 1 million?
- Well, son, it's not a tricky business, and we need money, of course I could!
Then he approaches grandmother with the same question, grandmother answers him:
- Of course, granddaughter! If I had a million dollars, I would have lived the same number of years !!!
It's grandfather's turn, grandfather answers:
- Well, actually, once does not count, so of course - yes, for this million we would build a house by the sea, but we would finally leave the grandmother!
The son returns back to his father with the results, and the father says to him:
- You see, son, in virtual reality we have three million dollars, but in real reality - 2 simple # tutki and one pid @ p # s!
The girl invited the guy to visit, romantic, everything. And at
The girl invited the guy to visit, romantic, everything. And at this moment his stomach twisted, he simply had no strength to endure. So they come to her apartment and the girl says:
- You come in, do not be shy, go into the room, and now I'm going to the bathroom - I'll powder my nose ...
The guy was somehow uncomfortable asking for her in advance, he decided to be patient, although he could not bear it anymore. He walks into the room, looks - such a big dog is sitting. He picked it up and piled it in the room, and thinks that he will dump everything on the dog later, and at that time he was happy to drink tea in the kitchen.
The girl from the bathroom comes out and asks him:
D: Why aren't you going into the room?
P: Yes, there is a big dog, I'm afraid of it.
D: Found someone to be scared, she is plush ...
P: Wow, but shit like a real one!
Perestroika, collective farms are slowly dying out, all gathered
Perestroika, collective farms are slowly dying out, all the animals have gathered in the farmyard and are discussing their future fate.
The first were the bulls, they say: We must leave here while the hooves are intact. The roof is already in the hangar all leaked, that is not rain, so we swim like ducks. Next come the pigs: they haven't eaten normal food for 100 years, the straw is all rotten, water is given every three days. It is impossible to live like this, you have to get out. All other animals supported: Yes, yes, enough endure it and let's go. One Sharik sits on the spot, everyone asks him:
- Sharik, why are you sitting? Go with us!
The ball answers:
- No, I won't go with you, I have a prospect!
Animals:
- What is the perspective? You'll die of hunger here!
Ball:
- No, guys, I have a prospect here!
Animals:
- Well, what is your prospect here, get sick, pick up fleas and die alone here!
Ball:
- Not guys, I have a perspective ...
Animals:
- What kind of perspective?!?!?!
Ball:
- I heard here that the hostess told the owner "... if things continue like this, then we will suck at Sharik all winter ..."
New anecdotes
The husband runs home and says to his wife - WIFE, urgently, we have
The husband runs home and says to his wife - WIFE, urgently, we will have guests in half an hour, I called our boss to our house! Wife:
- You are crazy?! We have nothing to eat!
- Well, figure something out, you must definitely do something, because tomorrow they will distribute money, who will be raised the salary!
- So we have nothing but soup and a can of peas!
- So, listen carefully! When he comes to us, I will tell him that you made an awesome steak with peas, and for now I will treat him with my own moonshine. And then you accidentally break a plate in the kitchen and shout that you dropped the steak and now it is in the trash, you will have to serve only peas, nothing can be done.
We agreed, the boss came. The husband treats him to moonshine, then yells to his wife:
- Wife! Get the steak!
Plates fall in the kitchen, crash!
Husband:
- Well, what are you doing there? Did you really drop the steak into the trash?
From the kitchen of sobs:
- No, peas!
The speakers are playing - Nino Rota, "The Godfather" theme ("Why did Gerasim drown his Mumu")
Many times they tried to offend me with the words "And you are vindictive", saying this in an offended and shocked tone, as if I was caught in my closet with jam. Moreover, 100% speak people who clearly counted on my short memory, and suddenly ran into a dummy with poppy seeds. I usually answer: "Yes, I am," without feeling any shame for my antisociality.
For me, rancor has never been and never was considered a disadvantage. Firstly, I am from birth rubbish and a moral monster, and secondly, I do not commit acts that must be remembered evil. Not from high-grade sincerity, but solely from laziness and lack of necessity. Since I approach the problems of good and evil with my characteristic bookkeeping meticulousness, I believe that a person should respond symmetrically to any attitude towards him. They hit me on the right cheek - let them substitute the left one, otherwise I will hit in the balls. I'm not vindictive. I am angry, and I have a good memory.
The ridiculous idea of \u200b\u200bforgiving insults could not not be hammered into me, not ironed. It is incompatible with my physiology, as if it (or me) had been carried from another planet. Perhaps this is a quirk and it needs to be treated, but I treat my grievances just as sensitively as I treat other feelings. The feeling of resentment arises as naturally as the feeling of hunger, a feeling of fear, a feeling of love, and I personally do not understand why it should be treated with less respect than the above. I would even say that it is much more important.
Unlike the feeling of fear, which can arise due to circumstances beyond our control (such as a hormonal change; when taking birth control pills, causeless fears occur regularly), the feeling of resentment has very real roots. Except for mental illness or sandpit resentment. It arises when the rights of our precious personality, our one and only essence, are violated. The person who offended me showed disrespect for my personality. This is not to step on your feet, pulls at least a serious apology.
Slaty bluuantin about the incontinence of resentment inside yourself, leave your grandmother with hemorrhoids, she will benefit from incontinence. Until life shows that they are always driven to those who are lucky, if you swallow the offense once, you will swallow the second, and the third, and for dessert. The average person is trained no worse than the Pavlova dog, he was let off his swine behavior once, he decides that he can be a pig with impunity. Aunts with morals and toil with shitty peasants, because every time they are offended, they freeze in idleness and confidence that someday this bastard will come to his senses. Fuck bald he will change his mind. Even if he drives her into the coffin, he won't change his mind, he will only think about where he can find the next fool. But if, after the first impudent woman, she arranged the sky like a sheepskin for him, he would have only two life choices - to become small-small or become far-distant. In the first case, she will be with an obedient man, in the second, without a lousy man at all and with great time savings in searching for a normal one. As an additional bonus, she would have made five more grandmothers happy, because once the Muschin passed through the Crimea and the ring will seriously think about whether he should cheat a second time. But, unfortunately, there are fewer serious women among us than well-read women, therefore there is no one to marry.
By the way, mostly men also wrote about non-resistance to evil by violence. And by the way, other men do not fall for this nonsense, but all only women who, in search of justice for themselves during this life, begin to apply the written to themselves. And from that moment on, monstrous nonsense begins, because no one measures a dress bought under someone else's size, and they try to measure an ideology made according to someone else's size. In the matter of religion, I adhere to the same position as in matters of diet - it is harmful to adopt geographically and nationally alien ideologies. If you believe that your karma will turn blue from this surrender and will fall off by morning, then it will definitely fall off, even if you soak it all night in the waters of the sacred Ganges. And if you stand on the positions of the Western philosophical school and respect yourself like the last time, then the karma will fall off from the offender. Who, one wonders, is more pitying?
Remembering the wrongs is not only good, but also right. As the godfather said, "accidents do not happen to people who take accidents as personal insults." Not every person has the strength of mind to stand up for themselves, not everyone was given pies with pepper in childhood, but there should be enough internal strength to overcome the sclerosis of complacency. To begin with, to correct the attitude towards the offended person. Allowed himself too much - yeah, it means that in such and such matters you cannot rely on him, in such and such situations he is a boor and a cattle, he considers you so and so. The latter is extremely important, more important than pseudo-nobility, because usually it is hidden under layers of manners, benefits, social requirements. After the audit, you suddenly get smarter, and because any lesson is beneficial, the next time you will not allow such an attitude towards yourself. If someone thinks that forgiveness of offenses will become spiritually higher, he is lying to himself. He will not get higher, he will become weaker. He deliberately closed from himself the opportunity to a) draw conclusions, b) make himself invulnerable to similar situations, he will always be subtle and will always torn. You become spiritually higher not by being silent, but by answering with the same force, but no more, not exceeding the limits of necessary self-defense, stopping the hand that has swung a second time.
For the information of the noble and indignant - I have no ulcers, my heart is in order, I sleep well at night, I do not grind my teeth in impotent rage, I take nootropil to improve my memory.